Yesterday was supposed to be my baby girl Raelynn’s due date. I spent the day at home working on homework and sitting with my thoughts, wondering “what if?” and thinking about everything that could have been.
Today, May 17, also marks one year since the house fire that changed my life forever. A year ago, I lost everything, including two of my pets who were family to me. Then, in the same month, a day earlier, was the due date for my daughter who I never got the chance to meet. This month has carried so much pain and heartbreak over the past year, and at times it has felt impossible to move forward.
But through everything, I’m learning that I cannot let the hardest moments of my life define who I am or determine my future. I have to keep going—not only for myself, but for my family and for the dreams I still have ahead of me.
In June, I will be graduating from Western Michigan University, and that is something I am incredibly proud of. Despite everything life has thrown at me, I kept pushing forward and accomplished something positive.
Next comes a new chapter: beginning my IVF journey, starting a new job, and stepping into a new career position. Life may not have gone the way I imagined, but I still believe there are better days ahead for me and my family.
Life is what you make it. If I allow myself to focus only on the pain and negativity, it will only make the journey harder. So instead, I’m choosing hope. I’m choosing healing. And most importantly, I’m choosing to keep moving forward.
ailleenfamily 